Thursday, December 30, 2010

Oldies but Goldies

             As 2010 comes to a close, I look back on all the things that have happened this year. More recently, I’ve been noticing a lot of news revolving around sports and celebrity figures that are getting much older and starting to show it. When will they call it quits from their current business endeavors? At what age is “too” old? Who will be the first to call it quits? These are just questions I can’t answer with modern science. It seems like the mind is over coming matter and more importantly age and vigorous activities. Let’s get a better idea of just who I am talking about.
            Brett “The Jet””Dick Pick” Favre
  • Man does this guy have it bad or what. Played all of those years with the Packers and now is jumping from team to team trying to find a home. Did well with the Jets, but now seems to be stuck in Minne”snow”ta. Not to mention he was just slapped with a $50k fine for not complying with the investigation that would have proved him sending dick pics to the New York Jets reporter.
  • First off, yes Brett you still are a decent quarterback, yes you still throw for more yards than Chris Simms (but who doesn’t?) and yes your wrangler jeans make it appropriate to play football in denim. But come on, you are 41 years old. That’s good enough in my books for a career in the NFL. Most players don’t make it past 10 years if they are lucky. There is a reason why Aaron Rogers is doing awesome as your replacement at Green Bay. He is young and full of testosterone and ready to rock. I gotta say, with these recent pictures surfacing…I can tell your storage is running a little low. Now you’re injured? Shouldn’t this add more fuel to your flame to “stay and play”? No! It should be a sign. How many more injuries are you going to risk your health for just to play one more game? What if you beat Dan Marino and Troy Aikman in concussions and have to resort to being the worst commentators in football behind Keyshawn Johnson (I actually like Troy’s reporting…doesn’t mean it’s good)? Will that be a good enough sign? There is plenty to do in retirement Brett. You could start a charity, sell more Wranglers, or be a family man…for once. Just enjoy the time where you can do whatever you want with your family and be happy.
Hugh Hefner
  • I gotta give it to the guy. He just turned 84, got engaged, and has everything that a superficial and regular man could ask for. But when will there ever be a time when you want a break? 84 years old and still sexually active? Wow I am impressed and I won’t even deny it. Not only am I but every boy under the age of 13 wants to be you when they grow up. You are an innovator, a business man, and what seems to be, a “family oriented” man…regardless of how you define family.
  • But seriously Hugh, take it easy. All those years of partying and drinking scotch has to catch up at some point. The human ticker just isn’t made like it is in the movies. Maybe even get a hover-round, like Deion Sanders, and save the pain walking around. Or maybe not make so many guest appearances to your parties but instead, enjoy a nice quiet evening at home and get a good night’s rest. That would really put my mind at ease about your well being.Maybe just ease up a little, so that we may enjoy you a little longer. Not to mention those wonderful publications and reality TV shows you so thoughtfully provide to the average Joe.
Joe Paterno
  • Now I know half of you readers are saying to yourself, who the hell is Joe Paterno and why do you even care about him. Well you jabronies, Joe Paterno is the coach of Penn State football team and has been for over 40 years. He has a record of 401–134–3 regular season games, and a bowl record of 24–11–1. He is also one of three active coaches to be in the Hall of Fame. So there is your back ground. My point to this is, Joe you are 84 and coaching football. I am pretty sure high school coaches don’t even live to be close to that because they are too busy ripping souls out of poor kids trying to learn a life lesson in a sport. You are centered on the most high intensity sport in America, maybe even the world at some points (don’t confuse the Super Bowl with the world cup of soccer or even a UEFA Cup match). I mean really how many more “near” heart attacks can you have until it becomes real? We know you did take some time off the field and coached from the box a season or two ago, but there is no way that that was enough time.
  • Penn State has actually had a turn-around in season records since 2004. Going to many bowl appearances and winning most of the time. But Joe, are you really hunting for one more national championship? Or are the 2 titles you already have enough? Because they are more than most coaches can dream about coaching a division one team.
  • Personally, I think Paterno is a great coach. But I’d like to see him around a few more years.  So maybe, if someone could pass this along to him, not tear into so many young players hearts and verbally rip their faces off. I mean it is your job as a football coach. But with your current age and health status, I think a few less wouldn’t hurt anyone. Who knows you might give another coach the chance of a life time, to verbally rape a player without facing a real jury.
                So old guys in the spot light, we all still like you and we want you to hang around just a little more, even if it is to sell some tough “football ready” jeans, or even an adult magazine to some 12 year old boys. Just take it down from a 10 to a 9, so that you can continue to prosper.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Teenage Heart-Throb, Young Adult Idol

               Being a 90s kid, I woke up every Saturday to watch my favorite TV shows. So of course, most of them were cartoons and on Saturday, they were always new. Regardless of soccer games or whatever practice was scheduled, I always got up to watch my shows. And even now, I watch shows that remind me of the “the good ol days” and actually find them more enjoyable. Is it because of the adult content they plugged into each show that I was too young to notice? Or is it the simplicity of the writing that makes me still watch it today? No matter what it is, I still continue to watch.
                Ever since I had 8 am classes in college, and now that I have to be at work at 8, I wake up rather early. Let’s just say earlier than most of my friends can remember me rising from the dead. Good for me because I get the day started and I am awake. But the best part for me is the 2 hours every morning that are dedicated to the greatest teen show of the 90s, Saved by the Bell. This show has everything; cool guys, jocks, nerds, geeks, babes, life lessons, friendship, and all those other good things associated with high school…right? Well no normal high school is like that but some of the pieces are the same. But there is one character that makes that show work without flaw. Zack Morris. Yes he is obviously the main character, (Mark-Paul Grosselaar) but he is just so awesome that it is just worth dissecting his life on the show.

                As everyone knows, the early years, (middle school) and the later years (college years) were not the best of the show. The shenanigans were not as believable or even fun. There were too many life lessons. Almost like if Tyler Perry was white and wrote a TV show about young kids in different stages of school. But he really took shape in the high school years, which are everyone’s favorite. So let’s start from the top.
                His hair
·         “Feathered and Flawless.” I am pretty sure that Zack Morris always had the best and newest hair styles. Always a perfect part on one side and always gelled to perfection. Sleeking back the sides just topped it all off, with a short guard to shave each side of his head. A classic 90s move in hair styling. I am pretty sure I had that look at some point as I am sure you did too. Even in the college years, he had the longer, Tom Brady style hair. When you have a mane like that, it’s better to grow it than blow it.
90s attire
·         This just screams out 90s from all angles. Tucked in T-Shirts, high waisted jeans, sweaters and shirts with crazy patterns and color schemes just to name a few. There was no way around it, he was the epitome of style. Not to mention his high tops that came back in style recently. Reebok and Nike wish they would have signed a deal with him, because he was always sporting their shoes over his jeans. Yet another classic 90s move.
Technology
·         Zack had all the correct up-bringing. His dad was a successful computer salesman, his best friends Screech had a talking/thinking robot, he had unlimited access to the coolest phone ever invented …what more could you ask for? Not only that, growing up in California yielded the perfect surroundings for all the gangs fun and adventure. All of which he planned himself. Probably using a computer, I’m sure. Not to mention the cost of computers then were probably the amount of a small car loan. But since his dad was number one in the company, it never became an issue.
Money
·         I am pretty sure that Zack’s pocket book could be described by modern day rappers as “pockets stuck on overload, my rain never evaporate.” It never was an issue. Yes, he did bet constantly to increase his wealth. But who doesn’t do that already. The more money you have, the more risks you take. Granted the bet amounts with A.C. Slater were for nothing more than 50 bucks at a time, but that went a little further back in the early 90s. Back to the dad thing, since Zack did not work and obviously did not pay for that cell phone bill, I can only imagine that dad was the financial backing for everything. Especially for all those dates he went on. It seems like every episode, more toward the end, the Macks appeared to step up pricing and Zack was stepping up his dating game. Thanks a lot Kelly Kapowski for making Zack drain his allowance all on you.
Brains
·         Zack scored a 1502 on his SAT. Como say what? Baking powder? Some people just have it all. He also knew how to manipulate every game and bet he was in. It did not always work out in his favor, but he always had his hand in the game some way or another. Maybe the creator of “the game”? The world may never know.
Babes
·         I use this term because it was the exact phrase used throughout the show and also in the 90s to refer to good looking women. Let’s just say that there was no limit to the amount of girls Zack had. If she was new, she was on a date with Zack instantly. Even if the person casted had been an extra on the show for years, she was always deemed a “hey baby” look from Zack at some point. But do you ever wonder exactly what Zack had done with each girl? Was he just a womanizer, using each one for sex and pleasure? Or was he a gentleman, taking each girl on a date and treating them correctly? Maybe things did work out every time (they never did) and he was just “friends” with each girl after. Who knows?! Nobody will ever know that one. There were no signs of what really went on after the Macks or after that movie date. Zack even scored with a college girl and utilized a fake idea to party at the Attic. Good  for him.

Yes please!

Kelly Kapowski
·         Babe of all 90s teen babes. She played every sport imaginable at Bayside. Captain of the 3 girl cheerleading squad (like she couldn’t beat out Lisa), all star volleyball player, softball ace, this girl had it all. Not to mention she was the “one” for Zack. Just took a few goons she dated to get it out of her head that there was no other like Zack.
Notable achievements
·         Not to mention his almost perfect SAT score, Zack also birthed a baby in an elevator, saved animals from an oil spill, created buddy bands (the hottest selling item since the slinky), and he was also in the famous band Zack Attack. Do you think Screech could write a song like “friends forever”? I think not. No nerd could ever be that creative and look that good. All while making it to school on time because…you guessed it, he was saved by the bell.
                This character had many facets to him. All of which everyone knows. But do you really sit and think about what made him successful? Maybe I just really like the show and that’s why I think about it. Or maybe I wanted to be Zack in high school. Probably not the second part but he was really cool. Right? If Zack was a real person, would you want to be in his crew? I know I sure would.
Here’s to you Zack Morris, may your name live on forever in the halls of Bayside and in the halls of our young, teenage 90s hearts.

Monday, December 27, 2010

3-D...Disturbingly overpriced, Distracted by head gear, Diluted by bright lights

                Happy Holidays to all the readers and followers. I don’t know about you guys, but I love the holidays and I love specially Christmas time. It’s just means more time to spend with family and friends. The only thing different this year than all the previous is I am currently at work immediately after the holidays. Not the worst thing in the world but it’s all part of being a big kid.
                So the weekend started off just the way I liked it; with a paid day off on Friday. Is there anything better? I mean I am getting paid to be at home and not to mention I left really early on Thursday. So that was pretty radical. Santa came to the house as usual. But my list was short this year and that is how I wanted it to be. But he capitalized and came through big. Better yet I stuff myself so hard all weekend with Christmas “unhealthiness” but it was so worth it. And what does someone do on a day where everything is closed except the only companies that force their employees to work? Go see a movie! One of my most favorite things in the world. Not to mention for once, there are more than just one decent flick in the theaters worth seeing. But I could not say the same for my crew. There are few movie interests that I have that coincide with my friends. Being good friends, they still tag along and most of the time and end up really liking whatever we end up seeing.
                But there is a plague that is streaking across America and more recently, hitting the households of unsuspected, good American citizens. It’s called 3-D!

                This is by far the worst advancement that man has made in the past 5 years in cinema quality and picture clarity. I can remember when the local theater had the DLP HD projectors and it made everything look so much better. And also they installed a good amount of HD projectors after the DLP bust. This was by far the best thing next to IMAX movies. But 3-D movies are just a waste of money. Everyone thinks it’s so awesome and so new, things really pop out of the screen. Yeah right! It’s a joke and a terrible one. All at the cost of 5 extra dollars per movie, as if they were not already expensive for a non student ticket. Let’s look at my bulleted list.
  • 3-D is stupid and a terrible technology. Why? Because it isn’t new. There isn’t anything “new” or “ground breaking” about it. As I recall, there has been 3-D images produced in comics, magazines, and older movies years ago. Why is it so cool and so new that everyone needs to make a big fuss about it?
  • It costs significantly more. I remember my freshman year of college, movies were only 5 dollars. That was 5 years ago. Now they are almost 10 and for a 3-D movie, sometimes (depending on the theater) it costs closer to 15 dollars. Is that even necessary? I don’t think so.
  • The picture quality is not even that much better. They actually even play a message that says half the movie was shot in regular movie 2-D. I took my glasses off during Tron Legacy and the picture was perfect. Wow, I had to sit through the entire movie thus far and half of it looks fine without the discomfort?
  • There are very few visuals that are even “eye popping” or jump out at you. It doesn’t even stimulate the senses enough to warrant the price and the terrible picture quality.
  • The glasses are uncomfortable and don’t fit every ones face. They do not even look cool. As a matter of fact you couldn’t pay me to take them home. The ones for home entertainment are even uglier and bulkier. Why do I want to wear glasses when my vision is perfect and I am at home? You’re right, I don’t.
  • Associated with movie costs, the 3-D TV cost is even more than a regular, LED, 240 hertz awesome viewing screen. Plus the image quality still doesn’t compare.  I don’t know one tech savvy person who has bought one. Why? Because the technology is not even developed enough to justify the 3k price tag.
  • Every movie is coming out in 3-D now. It is ruining my experience. I would much rather save the money I would spend going to the movies and buy the BluRay when it comes out for close to the same price and better quality. Now I have to wait to see Thor because they are releasing it in 3-D. Ruining everything. I don’t want to see his hammer fly at me once I want to enjoy the ENTIRE MOVIE.
  • HD cameras produce a better image than 3-D cameras. Have you seen Lord of the Rings on BluRay? It’s amazing! The colors are simply brilliant. And they were using almost 5 year old technology and the quality was about 10x better than movies that come out in 3-D. Just think of how awesome and non complex the camera systems are now for HD movies. Probably 10x better than 5 years ago. Hell probably 10x better than last year. No one needs 3-D capable camera when an HD camera is looking more like real life.
  • The images are always unstable when wearing 3-D glasses. Not only is it hard to completely focus on. You can always see imperfections. Most of the time the images do not match up so it doesn’t even look 3-D, just a blurry cartoon drawing like the first and second season of the Simpsons. And it only focuses on intense lighting effects and not always the main focal point of the camera. FAIL!
Enough about our consumer based cinematic technological advancements. Let me rant and rave about the movies I did see regardless of format.
                It was a Jeff Bridges filled weekend.

  • Tron Legacy: This flick was awesome. Best Sci-Fi movie that has come through in a while. Almost as visually stimulating as Avatar but defiantly could have used a “non Disney” production to it. But the original was excellent for the 80s and this sequel we very gnarly for the 2000s. I just wish I had watched the original before to freshen up on my exact programming lingo.
  • True Grit: Yet another amazing film. More dialog than I expected, but well worth it. Not to mention a couple of face blasts that made me cringe with excitement. And an all start cast that I didn’t not realize was cast. But fortunately for me, Alamo draft house played a few short clips from the original. I do not think I had ever seen it but my dad loves John Wayne and knew everything about the movie. So as soon as he views it, I can get a better understanding.
I give both of these movies 2 thumbs up. Go see them. But not in 3-D!
So overall, I had a great weekend. Great friends in town, great family around, great everything. Not to mention how great a beer tasted after a hard day of opening presents.
Sidebar: I think I have strayed too far from my original idea for this blog. I need to get back to it. This is my last rant about something that I think about and I will get back to the original, “situational” thoughts that I come up with. I still have them but sometimes these take precedent because they happen more frequently. Don’t worry faithful readers. I’ll get back to the good stuff real soon. Maybe tomorrow?! Im cooking up something real nice like.

Thursday, December 23, 2010

"Where's the love man?"

               At some point or another, everyone is considered a hater. Whether you hate on a person, a restaurant, a drink, someone’s shoes, someone’s face, someone’s bone structure, or even Tom Brady. We are all still haters. But there is a specific kind of hater that has come into circulation that apparently causes a lot of conflict. Personally I laugh about this sector of hate because it is so silly and so outlandish, that at times, I even join in. You guessed it. I am talkin about you, “E-Thugs.”

                Due to my upbringing in the modern game world, I always had access to some sort of gaming machine. Up until about the time I was 15-16, I did not have access to a microphone, nor did I play games via the interweb that had voice communication. But hello high school and hello counter-strike. This is the first and probably the best example of the origins of an “e-thug” that I can remember. Let’s look at a few definitions that urban dictionary provides regarding this coveted title:
·         Electronic thug. A pale, pimple faced, skinny white kid who would most likely burn up if he came into contact with natural sunlight. Spends all of his time threatening people over the internet to compensate for his lack of a life and hatred of humanity for not accepting him.
·         An internet thug. They usually sound very tough and scary. Does not show people who they are in public. Probably got picked on in school, comes online to higher their self-esteem. Talks a-lot of non-sense around the area of insulting your mommy to penis size. Stays behind the monitor so nothing can hurt them.
·         A shit stirring computer geek that only exists on the internet and thinks he is top shit by typing in capitals, swearing excessively and thinking they can kick your arse in a fight.

                These are just a few great examples of how to define one. I personally was never opened to the world of VOIP (Voice over IP) but I had a wide access to discussion forums. And as everyone knows, no one likes to be wrong…EVER. Not in real life and not in electronic or “E-Life.” So this whole talking business from behind a computer was nothing new, just something understood. But after entering the world of online gaming with a headset, my horizons expanded. Keep in mind this was around 1999, and the market for games played online was expanding as fast as my waist band on thanksgiving. So it took me by surprise at first that there are so many people out there just running their mouths behind a computer. But wait it gets better. For the most part, the ones that are “e-thuggin” are kids under the age of 13. It’s amazing the freedom that everyone has once their parents leave the room and shut the door. It’s almost like you would become a different person. To make it worse, there was no way of hiding the age of the individual. When your voice is higher than Mickey Mouse, there is no way you are 25 years old. Take that back, there is no way your balls have dropped. Sorry little guy but you have no credibility nor should your parents spoil you with enough freedom to openly express yourself on the internet.
                After counter-strike starting to phase out of mainstream gaming, and such titles as halo and ghost recon came into play, the “e-thuggary” stepped up its game. Computer systems were and still are not as cheap as a consul to purchase or maintain. The introduction of the $200 gaming system expanded the market to everyone. Yes there are kid friendly games (games approved for under the age of 13) but who really plays them? No body. No one wants to feel good about playing a game. You want to KILL KILL KILL. This is the driving force behind the internet. Be the best at all costs. And thanks to the easily accessible Wi-Fi capabilities, everyone is connected at some place or another.
                And to make everything worse, it seems like everyone always has something to say. Doesn’t matter if it is foreign affairs, current events, sports, the epidemic happening in the Ivory Coast, or what former president George W. Bush is eating for breakfast, there is always a comment to be made. Why? Cause people like to talk about everything. The best part about the internet, you can post anonymously about it, ranting and raving about something you don’t know real facts about, other than what you read on Google news.
                So that makes you a real expert right?
                Before I keep going on, I’ll admit, I am a direct result of all of this. Have I indulged in a quick “e-thug” pick me up from time to time? Yes I have. Have you ever talked over a child and it made you feel better because you are superior in every way? Yes it’s a terrible thing to say but to clown someone, via the internet, has no real concequences at all. That’s what the internet was really invented for. Well, that and porn, youtube, and hulu (Praise the internet Jebus).

                                Could a person really get away with running their mouth in public like they would on the internet? Not where I am from. What I have witnessed, mirroring your behavior online in a public situation is never tolerated. Granted I do have a little control of what comes out of my mouth, but there are some that don’t and they have received a pounding for it. Wanna start “e-thuggin” at a bar? Bad decision. You don’t have a computer screen to hide behind and 8 times out of 10; the guy listening in may poses the strength to ram that beer bottle down your throat. Just sayin.
Lets all face it. If you love sports and a specific sporting team (Cowboys and Astros fan here), then you are used to dealing with their ups and downs on a regular basis. And yelling at a tv or yelling at your fantasy cast computer screen is just as bad as posting it on a discussion form. If I ever saw Lance Berkman(when he was still with the team) in person, I would never say “way to blow that double play last night to win the game you jack wagon.” Why would I not say that? Not only is that rude, I may get a baseball bat to the face. Same with football or any other sport. You would never go up to a professional athlete and tell them to “suck it” for ruining the game, would you? It is so much better to do it in the privacy of your home because there are no consequences. Does it make it right? Probably not. It’s like talking about your friends behind their back. “Behind their back Thug?”
But as far as comments on personal opinions, I really don’t mind it, especially my own personal comments. It’s really what I am thinking and how I view things. And in the case of my blog (yes this is a reaction post), I welcome it. It actually makes me want to post more to stir a reaction. That’s what these things are all about… the reaction factor. The only thing I ask is you use proper grammar and sentence structure to publically defame my opinions.
So here’s to you, oh king of “E-Thugs”. Keep it up. One day it might actually be worth something. I’ll drink to that.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

"I feel like your're eye ballin me dawg"


                The gym is a great place to not only get your fitness on but also a great people watching place. For myself, I use it more to get a little blast session in to keep myself in tip-top physical form. But recently, I have noticed a lot more people watchers at the gym and a lot of people not doing their lifts correctly (younger guys and obviously young girls). The worst part for me is, sometimes I feel that because of my stature, people kinda eyeball me while I am working out. Let’s cut into this steak and get to the center of it.
                For those readers that don’t know me personally, I am 6’3’’, 180-190 lbs. I am nowhere near a body builder or a professional weight lifter but I can say that working out is one of the top 5 things I enjoy doing the most. Ask anyone and they will say, during the week, I can be found at the gym at the same time every night. Am I obsessed? I would say…moderately. But the amount I work-out is not what I am concerned with right now. It is the people at the gym and their habits.
                Don’t get me wrong, for my size I can put up a decent amount of weight. At the same time, I am no Johnny Bravo or no “bro” at the gym with my new haircut, just a regular weight lifter with better eating regiments than most people. I think that my physical size and the amount of weight I can lift kind of shocks some people at the gym. About 75% of the people that workout around the same time I do are physically bigger and have “bigger” limbs than myself. Nothing wrong with that, it just isn’t for me. Here is where I am getting into the main point of this post.
                Most of the time I am in there, I feel that people are bird doggin me because I venture past the 50 lb dumbbell range. When I go and pick up the 100 lb dumbbells to do flat press, I have the feeling that people consider me crazy.
                “This skinny white boy is thinking he can lift that? Yeah, right. What a clown.”
                That’s what I imagine in my head people saying. Especially the beef daddies in there at night. Not only that, I will go and do a set of pull ups after. Then I really feel people are watching. And there are two specific examples of this.
1.       There are two men who are exercising at the same general time I do during the week. Obviously they are in much better shape than me. These guys are fit and do very excellent workouts and when working out with a partner, you can achieve greater results. “Its science.” “I read it, in a book.” But somehow it always seems that what I am currently working (body part) always puts me right next to them. As a matter of fact I actually witness a guy watch me do a set of lateral pull downs…literally watched me the entire time. Ever since then, I always get this feeling they are just peepin my workouts. Why you ask yourself? I have no idea. Maybe they are getting ideas? Maybe because I shouldn’t be lifting such high weight and they think I’m looney? I don’t know the answers to this. This is just a more often than not occurrence.
2.       This next one happened a few weeks ago. I will call this guy “dreamy eyes”. So I am walking up to the gym, per usual when you are in the parking lot. Like any other time I open the door and noticed someone behind me. So I stepped to the side and held it open. It doesn’t matter who it was, I was just brought up to hold doors open. Well as a matter of fact it was a guy, about 5’5’’, and he looks up at me with the so called “dreamy eyes” and said “thanks.” Now there is nothing wrong here. I hope people would say thanks when I hold doors regardless of gender. Actually women are the worst about it. Ladies, take notes.
a.       So I continue with my workout as usual and obviously have to use the restroom a few times throughout my workout. For guys, as everyone knows, our locker/restroom/shower room is nothing compared to women’s. Where ever you go, men always have subpar standards when it comes to restrooms. It’s a fact and it’s something that is just accepted. Well I go to relieve myself after one of my sets. Well I noticed someone was walking out of the stall area, which has a door on it. So I opened it and who do you think it was? Dreamy eyes. He looks up at me, because I am almost an entire foot taller than him, and says “thank you”. But he is using that same look that babes do when they are really feeling a guy. After that I kind of brushed it off again. No big deal right? Well I saw him out on the weight floor doing whatever lift he was and what do you know I kept noticing looks being shot my way. Maybe I was too nice? Maybe I should only hold doors for women? Who am I to say?
Now on to the next topic, wrongful lifting forms. This comes easy for me because I have friends who constantly pound it into my head that I am doing it wrong and that it should be done like this. But the other night I look over at this girl and I literally stop what I am doing and just shake my head. Not to her obviously, I am not a jerk like everyone thinks. But simply because the way she is using the machine she is on is going to end up hurting herself. I really wanted to go up to her and say:
“Hey good job on being in the gym and working out, but watching you do this machine is really detrimental to my workout because I am worried you are going to injure yourself. Please let me help you so that you can come back again another day”
                But would I ever say that to someone? Probably not. Who am I to give fitness advice? I am obviously not a personal trainer, nor have I ever studied, more than reading books, upon the subject. My friends don’t even take fitness advice from me. Who am I to tell the girl wearing an ankle brace to stop doing weighted step ups? Maybe she wants to break her ankle again. I don’t know these things. But it sure does bother me.
                The gym is a good medium to meet people, if you are comfortable doing so, and it is also one of the many places offered in the world to better yourself. But for me, while “bettering myself,” it comes with a lot to think about while using the facility. It has never been so bad but it certainly is interesting enough for me to sit and think about.

DeeG

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

"Im gettin Rosa Parks'ed back here"


               The title has nothing to do with this post but it was something I said to a flight attendent asking if i could get a closer seat on the plane trip back from Vegas. Dont worry, the plane was empty and I got a better seat. Everyone thought it was funny...at least I did.
               So the NFL is coming to a close for the season. Well at least the regular season is almost over and the playoffs will start soon. More importantly I didn’t make it past the first round in Fantasy playoffs. There is always next year. That is the key to football and the phrase that gets tossed around all the time. But throughout this entire season, there were some key occurrences that everyone decided to talk about all the time and harp on the negative impact that it had on the sport. Most of which are more recent than others but some carried out through the entire season. Let’s dive in.
                As everyone knows, Michael Vick is back playing football after his jail spree and dog killing days. Not only is he playing, he is starting. He also has more rushing yards than some running backs. Can you say that Tim Hightower has 613 yards this season? I think not. What a terrible fantasy pick up by me. What about 2755 passing yards? Matt Shaub can’t say that he did that either with confidence. I don’t even want to get into how many touchdowns he had because it would make everyone else look silly. Let’s just say that David Akers had more points than most of the players in the NFL this season…kicking. Why am I bringing up this “dog killer”? Simply because, that is all everyone can associate with him. Yes, he in fact did kill many dogs over the years until he was caught. Yes, it is one of the worst things that could be done in today’s modern society. Yes, he did go to jail and did deserve everything that happened to him because of his stupidity. For the most part this is all people care about.
                “Did you see Vick score 50 points last week?”
                “Yes I did but he is still a dog killer.”
                WHO CARES?! Get over it. I will be the first to admit it was a stupid, idiotic thing to do. Inexcusable. But that was in the past. Does everyone disagree with George Bush and Barak Obama for all the choices they have made in the past? Yes they do and that is fact regardless of party affiliation. But Michael Vick is an outstanding athlete. Always has and always will be. How long is everyone going to hate, and I do mean hate because people still talk so negatively about him, when he is winning games and taking a team to the playoffs single-handedly? From the looks of it, forever. Grow up. People always talk about giving second chances and forgetting the past if they do right in the future. You know what I say to all those jabronies who hate on Vick? “You’re livin in the past mannnnnnnn”
                What would jebus do?
                Ask yourself this: Who is worse for what they did?
                                Michael Vick, for killing dogs and paying the price?
Or
                                Michael Jackson for touching kids…for years… never facing the jury?
                That’s what I thought.
                Next on the list, which I have discussed with many people and it is always about different situations is the whole fighting on the field ordeal. Mainly, about the most recent fight between Andre Johnson, of the Houston Texans, and Courtland Finnegan, of the Tennessee Titans in late November. Before I go any further into this thought, I will make my point now and say fighting on the field of play in any sport is unnecessary and very unprofessional. I would never sit and watch a game and say, “man I hope there is a fight today.” It makes both parties look childish and is just wrong. Grow up you big babies and play football.
                I digress.  Now as bad as this fight was and as terrible as it made both of them look, I feel that this was necessary. Finnegan is a dirty player and always has been. Everybody knows it and it is no secret. He just messed with the wrong guy and obviously someone that was 3 times his size. After the incident, Johnson goes public and apologizes for his actions. Paraphrasing the interview he “was sorry” and “that was not me out on the field”. But I see it a little different. Johnson should be proud of what he did. Yes there are politics involved in every sport and it’s all about appearance, especially when there is so much money in contracts these days. But come on. This guy is a DICK to everyone all the time. He needed someone to put him in his place. And you know what? You were just the guy to do it. You are about 75lbs of pure muscle mass bigger than him, faster, and have hands the size of basketballs. No wonder you have so many touchdowns and over 1000 yards on the season. If I were Finnegan, I would try and find a smaller receiver, someone who actually matches up in size to put hands on. But no, he had to pick someone who was obviously bigger than him.
                Would you let someone at a bar or social situation keep pushing you around all night? Would you sit there and take it and watch the same person do it to everyone else? I don’t think so.
                Twitter and Facebook blew up almost immediately after the altercation took place. People praising Johnson for doing the right thing, that everyone has more respect for him now, and that they were proud to be a Texans fan. These are the people speaking for the people. Should Johnson have apologized publically? Yes he should have. He is smart and knows how to play both the political game and also the game of football. Everyone needs to lay off him and “let it be”. He didn’t cheat on his wife, he didn’t have relations with 14 different women, and he didn’t do anything that bad. As I can remember, no one has really brought the matter up. So it’s not a big deal.
                Everyone that knows me knows I am not the most intelligent football/sports critic. That’s ok, I never said I was and I know I never will be. But, these were some big situations that came up and that actually are still being talked about to some extent. And if you think I have a different stand on the matter discussed, then you obviously didn’t read my opening statements. These are just my own thoughts and they are as simple as I have described them above.
                Have something else you would like me to expand on? Foreign politics? Current affairs? Technology trends? Celebrity gossip? Drinking? Look to my contact page to email me suggestions.

-DeeG

Monday, December 20, 2010

Saturday Night Fever

                It’s Monday again and that means I am back at work. But wow what a weekend. Seems like it flew by so fast I didn’t have time to sleep. That is probably because I didn’t sleep very much at all. But that’s just another “Vegas” thing to do, especially when you’re with good friends. But as for an update from Saturday’s activities, here it is.
                Going to sleep when the sun rises, or for some when high noon hits, is just a normal thing on vacation right? I mean don’t get me wrong, I will be the first to admit how much I love to sleep. But when there is only so much time to spare for sleep when it could be spent doing who knows what…I’ll take the uncertainty of being awake.
                The night started out just as early as the last one. There was a birthday occasion that was being celebrated so we started off with a dinner of kings. Expecting to pay a lot for dinner, just because it’s Vegas, was not the problem. The problem was that the food was so good and so filling, how could we make it out for the last night in town?! Steaks were flying, side dishes were being passed, lobster bisque was being spooned into every mouth and not to mention the home made whipped cream to give us that slight insulin boost we needed to wake up. Needless to say we were all just a little too satisfied with our meal.
                It was a good thing we made such good friends with the party bus driver from the night before because it would have been terrible carting 10 people around in cabs trying to coordinate everything. Not only that, there is always a need for a party bus. And this time we were smart and brought enough drinks and mixes to feed an entire AA meeting. As usual, we always run out of ice. Ice is always an interesting thing because there never seems to be enough of it or there is always a need for a colder drink. These were two problems we ran into many times. That means we had to stop at the local gas station to restock on frozen H2O.
                So I expected some interesting places and people in Vegas as I expect here in Austin but I assumed that the gas station was a sanctuary for regular, hard working Americans. Well I was I was right about the hard working part. The guy at the desk was on the night shift and had to work until 6 am…when he got there at 6 pm. And of course there are always the best items right by the register. I guess the new cool thing, in the form of energy supplements, is a vapor that you inhale that gives you a boost of energy. Conversing with the clerk I asked which one was the best. He was reluctant to advise using one because he said they are stupid. I made the comment that “is it like doing cocaine?” and that started a riot of laughter. The guy behind me stated “haha yeah its just like that…I got some though.” I just shook off the comment and smiled and laughed with him continuing the conversation with the clerk. Finishing out my transaction, I had something else hilarious to say and everyone laughed again. The same guy behind me goes “haha no really I have some if you want it.” I knew it was time to get back on the bus and get the party started.
                So tonight was the night where we hit the best club in town, the one that everyone talks about, TAO. Needless to say, it was magical. Right when walking in there are girls taking baths in rose petals, and swarms of people. This place was THE place to be. With it being two stories, the top was obviously where the party was at. We stroll up and boom hit with more intense face pounding action. There were girls laying on couches that resembled opium whores in Saigon, laying there with no emotion and no expression on their faces except needing more drugs to stay awake. But the dance floor was where it was going down. Resembling a Ghostland show, the lights were insane. Not to mention the first song of DJ Vice’s set just blew the place up. Lightening crashing, feathers falling from the sky, bottles popping, and fists pumping, was just the highlights of the beginning of the night. Once everyone finally got into the club, we all decided to get a Costco size bottle and grab a couch. Craig Owens, formerly from Chiodos said it best: “This is probably the best not to mention the worst idea that I have ever had.” Our area was right by the front so when our dance party got going we just took over the walk way, causing a problem once everyone was in the middle.
                So here is one of the odd things I found while enjoying my time at TAO. The music was awesome and it was steady dance party themed. But none of the DJs really mixed their tracks besides intros and outros. I went up to the hottie blonde DJ and wanted to get something that all of the crew knew and something that was just good music to jam to; Ratatat. Here is how the conversation went:
                “Do you have any of the Ratatat remixes?”
                “Who is Ratatat?”
“You don’t know who that is? It’s these two guys who “blah blah blah” (I don’t remember exactly what I said describing them)”
“What is a remix?”
“You know when they made the CD first and then some famous lyricists put words to their tracks?”
“Yeah no I don’t know who that is…”
                Wow for real?!? You are a DJ and not to mention you are a DJ in Las Vegas, the place where club music gets its fame and glory from. Ratatat is not the most famous group in the world but I am pretty sure their shows sell out and you don’t know who they are? Thanks, now I know there are better DJs outside of the party city capital. You jabronie.
                So we spent the rest of the night after the bottle finished upstairs on the main dance floor. It was out of control. Trapeze artists cruising the ceiling, more fists-a-pumping, beating the beat up, getting kicked out of VIP areas, getting into VIP areas, slanging shots of patron, and who knows what else.  Needless to say we stayed until closing…at 4:30. Then the coat check guy was being a big dbag and wouldn’t give us our coats back. He needed an exact description of it. Hey guy, they are all black and long cause its cold outside, let us see the jackets and we can let you get out early to your stupid after party.
                Next stop was Bills Saloon and Casino…or as I like to call it “Dirty Bills.” First off this place is gross and old. I mean older than old and might be one of the original places on the strip. But it was where everyone we talked to was going to after party. We roll up, have to pay the stupid door guy too much to get us past the velvet ropes, and then had to pay more once we got into the club. Dirty Bills was how do I say, oh that’s right, DIRTY! There wasn’t anything special about this place what so ever and resembled a regular club outside of Vegas, minus the only good thing about it which was it was open until who knows when. Needless to say it was lack luster, and ended up leaving and getting back to the hotel around 8 am. Finally a nights rest was in order. The only problem is that I had to be at the airport at 12.
                Looking back on the trip, I wouldn’t change a thing in the world. Not even Dirty Bill could have ruined the trip for me. I saved up money for a reason and had everything paid for a reason. I know what you do in Vegas and that is spending money. There is no way around it. But every dollar was well spent and everyone had a great time. This is what happens when you are surrounded by the right people who know how the world works…well not really, more like they love having a great time. Being 6’3’’ makes plane rides terrible and hard to sleep on. I finally got home and to sleep only to wake up and come to work.
              At least it’s a short work week and there isn’t much going on at the site. What will I come up with at work this week? I guess you’ll have to stay tuned and find out.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Vegas Baby!

           I am currently in Las Vegas living the dream here. But it got me wondering…why in all of this fun filled, easy living, no holds bars atmosphere do people question you doing a certain activity? Let’s get some examples rolling here just so you can see what I am talking about.
            So as usual, we are out kind of like in Austin…but bigger and harder because we are in Vegas. We expect certain things out of this trip. Of course it’s going to be expensive and its going to cost to get into places. Those are just things you live with and prepare for. On the other hand, doing things back home are apparently wild and new for this Vegas scene. We hit the town starting off at ROK here at the hotel. Not the worst club but there is certainly clubs like that back home. There was nothing fancy about it. Nothing really “Vegas” about the place.
            First thing into the night these two very average, very not attractive Vegas goers start hassling us about walking up to the front because we are on the list.
            “We are girls, if anyone should be going to the front it should be us.”
            “You need to wait with all of us”
            Look B there is nothing special about you so lay off. Not only that we are on the list. The coveted itemized paper that has our names on it and not yours. LAY OFF!
            Next we hit up Tryst. This is a real club. This is what everyone and their mothers wish clubs. This was a legit and was over the top and not to mention very very crowded. I have never seen so many blow outs since the inception of Jersey Shore exploded. A good scene to witness and think to myself “man I’m glad I don’t look like that guy”. Here is another place where things don’t translate. I order my usual drink, whiskey water, and apparently this was a little out of the ordinary. This Kim Kardashian look-a-like approaches me and we have the following conversation:
            “What are you drinking?”(I don’t know if she was thinking of picking me up or just curious)
            “It’s whiskey water.”
            “You actually drink that?!(in shock)”
            YES I drink a real drink not your stupid cherry vodka sour you got there. Wow not only did she look like Kim Kardashian…she was just as dumb as her. But it makes for a better story and a better blog post. The rest of the night was awesome and radical.
            So today, we decided to gamble a little at the new Cosmopolitan. A very excellent hotel and it just opened up on Wednesday before we got here. So brand new keep in mind. But here is the break down. I am nowhere near the smartest or the best black jack player but I love the game. So I was going with my Vegas theme of doing things in Vegas just because...I am in Vegas. My key move today was hitting on a 14 when the dealer had a favorable hand. Why did I do this? Its Vegas. Not only that, I doubled down. So I was really being foolish but you know what, it was worth it when it paid out. So lay off me! But the thing is, the dealer made it a point to announce that I was making a “Vegas” move every time  did it. Yes it’s the worst idea to do but when the next card turns out to be a 6, then it’s a risk worth taking.
            Who knows what will happen tonight. Its going harder and better than the night before. But for now I have to hit the tables. I got the itch. Let’s just hope I come back with something this time.

LEARN TO WALK AWAY WHEN YOU'RE AHEAD